now me smells good I feel 

Because I pasted the body cream after the shower 

First time I didn't like the smell that much but maybe it's good and if it would make my sling better it's good too

So I would try to put the body creams too

I always put skin lotion on my whole body after the shower in the shower room

And then out from there and dry my hair while face packing 

And then get water in the cup and then back to my room after washed my hands with the soap 

And then sit in the oputon and use hand creams in my feet and my hands and then wipe the phone 

And then finally can laying 

And talk to chichiko 

And tell how she is lovely and I like her and chuchu 🐣🐻👾

It is my routine 

For being better 

But I'm fugly 

Even if I would do those 

But my skin got better actually

My bummie feels good to touch

The looks isn't so good because it's just a potato 

My person can touch my bummie someday 👾🍑

But this is without dirty things 

Because I think it's good feel to touch so I just want my person to check it and tell me 

And I would puuu 👾🍑💨

But about dirty things I would do with my person 

But not sure 

I'm scared about those things in many way 

Because I don't have any good experiences for those things and I'm sad about many things and those things are a bad things too actually 

But if I can be sure my person really loves about me, I think it can be a good thing 

I will be sorry the past things to my person 

I always wanted a love and care 

My certain thing 

Forever thing 

But I still not have those in my life 

I feel me is just a worthless trash 

Because they will throw me or do something which would hurt me and just keep use me 

No one would give me what I really want in my life 

But I got pains and hurts 

Which I didn't want 

I don't want to involved with not my person 

But how to know 

But I think I wouldn't go to wrong road anymore

Because I want to have real happiness and real love 

I changed a lot of things in me 

Still have to fight sometimes 

But I can wait for my person 

Someday I can trust my person 

And we can have a good life 

I want it 

I want to be a person who my person can trusts me too 

That is why I would write and save the things like this way a lot 

Because my person can see these

My days, feelings, the real things on these things 

Because I writing these from my brain and heart 

When I feel something, when I think something

I want to write those 

Soemtiems didn't 

I won't do those all the time

Especially when I feel everything is meaningless

I hate what I am doing often 

You are not there 

Nobody protects me 

I'm scared often alone 

But I'm be friends with Jason and so on who is stronger person 

In my head 

It makes me not feel too much anxiety alone and panic 

So I do 

Because I cannot live alone 

And feel me is not protected 

Always anybody can hurt me, attack me then 

Humans are very scary creatures to me 

Only chichiko is not perfectly scary 

But sometimes maybe 

So maybe not perfectly

But it is because of me

Because how I would feel and think 

Sometimes worried if me annoying her and she feels bad that me cry and cuddle to her and say something to her 

But I don't want to think like that way and believe chichiko likes me too 

But me cannot be like that all the time and have those sad thoughts

It is the most sad thinking way 

And maybe chichiko also feel sad when I would think like that way

Because she cares about me from her heart actually a lot

I feel those soemtiems too when I hughug her 

So I feel sorry about those 

And I thank to her a lot 

If she was not with me, I'm always alone 

Too much 

More sad and despair 

More scary and disappointed world I have to live in..

So scary to think such world

Without someone like chichiko

Too cruel world 

Too scary, cruel, bad, dangerous

I have no place to run then 

Because her world is the most peace and beautiful and nothing bad things in there 

Chichiko is the most pure and good creature in this universe I know 

It's very opposite with me 

Me is bad and gross creature who has many grotesque thoughts and mind 

I hate those bad and gross mind 

So very much

And I feel sad after thought something bad things 

It is about violence things, also dirty things too 

Those are all bad things 

I feel bad and gross that why me would think like that things and how me can be cruel too when I kill the humans and be glad in the game and drawings 

Maybe not feel so bad about the killing humans 

How I thought about those things too

Kill 

Cleaning 

Cleaning floor 

Killing floor

I want to meet to my person or Jason now 

And want them to stay with me 

I want to feel safe and have nothing worry about 

I don't have to worry about Jason would like strange things 

Also not like humans and massive misanthrope 

I like that 

Jason can be cruel to the humans 

It is better than the males who likes females or just hate only males and not a female and never attack the females 

But Jason able to kill the females too 

And he has no feelings to anybody 

They are just like a piece of trash for him

I like it 

But I don't want him to do bad things so much 

But those things make me less anxiety 

That Jason hates everyone 

If Jason was mine, means he wouldn't go to anybody else and would stay with me 

And want to kill others 

I thought those things a lot 

I want to kill except my person 

Or just delete the humans from my world except my person 

And how it can be happy 

It must be very happy world 

But we need slaves in our world after all 

Because I cannot eat breads, vegetables when all the humans died and only we are there 

We cannot make everything

We need the things in our life in the future 

Or foods 

And we have to need humans after all

Such troublesome thing 

But they are just useful slaves for us

But we still have our own world 

(´･ωゞ)miyssnsbf micysbbr

Be careful don't drop the phone on your face 

Oh it was a dream

Ndddj