I talked alone a lot in the shower 

It is about my person 

I wanted to write all in here 

But I already talked a lot in my brain in there 

One thing I thought was I wanted to meet to my person until 30 years old

Because I want to have a lot of time and memories with my person quickly before die 

I want a long time with my person

Not want alone time so long 

It's enough for me 

I will be 30 next year?

But almost 2 years later 

Because my birthday is December 

I cannot believe it actually

Because nothing changed since 16 years old I think 

But that is sad that I couldn't spend the time with my person from those time too 

I wished me could spend the time with my person since me was a baby 

And until the end 

I cannot change anything even me would be 60 years old

Me is this 

Just changes others reactions to me

Me will be just retarded to others when I be more old and me was this

But I think me is this 

Because it's me 

Maybe age really not matter

But I think I cannot live until 100

So I wanted to spend the time with my person from the earlier time 

And feel happy a lot 

I am sad that I cannot do 

Even if I want to 

Wish to

Hope to

But I shouldn't throw this hope 

Because I am still alive today 

I think all have a hope 

If they are still alive 

And not kill themselves 

Someone who does really no hope

I think they would die 

But someone who still alive, there is still a hope 

Even if it is very small like a noseball level 

And something could make the hope more big 

And they can stand and live strong 

Humans always looking for something in their life 

And forgetting something in their life